Saw New Moon this weekend. Yes, I know. I’m 32, I shouldn’t be seeing a Twilight movie on opening weekend. I have seriously decided that magic must be real because as many complaints as I have about those books, I can’t put them down. I know Stephenie Meyers is Mormon, but somebody cast a spell on that manuscript. It’s like a crack pipe made of story.

So for good or ill, when my mother agreed to go with me, I snapped up that offer right away, and we were installed in the theater Friday (yes… don’t start with me…) for a pre-school-release feature (no screaming 13-year-olds this time, as I was subjected to on viewing Twilight; it was easier to hear, but less atmospheric). I think I like this one better than the book, although if I hadn’t read the book, I’m not sure I’d like the movie. If that makes any sense. As I mentioned in my original review of Twilight (the novel), I really don’t like the way genders are portrayed in the book. Bella is too dependent, too willing to let men tell her what to do, and too readily falls into gender roles and stereotypes. The movie, which lacks Bella’s narration proving she needs a swift kick into the post-feminist revolution era (although they did a clever bit with emails to Alice to give a little of it without having an actual narrator), she comes across as too angsty and man-dependent, but a lot of the stuff that really made me want to throw things wasn’t there.

Other thoughts…

• Big balls on the ending; I really like what they did.
• Nobody under the age of 18 should be allowed to go shirtless that often in a movie.
• Makeup department, read my plea. Pick. A. Skin. Color. Preferably not FRTE (see title).
• Especially not for Carlisle. Peter Facinelli is a cutie-pie, and I’m allowed to think that. Unlike with other actors in this movie, whose chest I never even glanced at once, despite its prominent placement throughout. In fact, can we come up with some way to get Carlisle’s shirt off in Eclipse or Breaking Dawn? Please?
• I liked Jasper much better in this one; gotta admit, I was totally wtf’d by everything about him in the first movie, from the makeup to the script to the acting. It was… bizarre. But this time? Pretty cool.
• Other parts of the movie made me feel like a dirty-old-hag who needs therapy because, officer, that beautiful, beautiful creature… that I never once looked at… really, I swear… didn’t look underage. Not after the haircut anyway.
• Special effects were much better, and there was a cool sequence at the end that combined several plotlines into one music-backed menagerie. Pretty cool.
• Pattinson needs somebody new in charge of Edward’s look. He is a good looking guy in a unique way, (which is one of the things I liked about him being cast as Edward, that handsome but not commonly so), but he looked like a heroin junkie in the Volturi sequences. I know the character’s not been eating and he’s miserable, but c’mon guys, this is a ROMANCE. The guys are supposed to be even better looking when they’re brooding… not bruised, emaciated, pallid and drugged.
• Which brings me to the same question that I had reading the books. Why does she choose Edward when Jacob is friendly, affirming, brave, supportive, and cute? No, wait, I get it now! ‘Cause Edward’s legal.

*sigh*…. when do Eclipse and Breaking Dawn come out? I need this series done and out of my system.